How to Heal When the Unimaginable Leads to Betrayal Trauma

Terry W. Reese • Jul 23, 2021

No one plans for a betrayal. That's what makes it so painful. After all, when you're part of a loving and healthy relationship, the last thing you do is prepare for your partner to break your trust. So, when deception becomes your reality, you're likely to develop symptoms of betrayal trauma too.

There's no way to prepare your mind and heart for the unimaginable heartache of a betrayal. Like PTSD, betrayal trauma can heavily affect your physical and mental health. As you move through the various stages, you may experience new, troubling symptoms.

Let's talk about the symptoms and stages of betrayal you may experience.

What is Betrayal Trauma?

Bloom for Women is a network of over forty thousand women who are healing from betrayal trauma. As a result, it's a place to find healing, compassion, and validation. In addition to support, you may also discover valuable tools or find a therapist who can help you heal.

First, let's define betrayal trauma. It's a condition that can lead to symptoms similar to those of PTSD that occur when a betrayal within a primary relationship takes place. Examples of betrayal can include infidelity, addiction, or financial deception. As a result, the sense of safety, security, and trust within the relationship is heavily damaged. Likewise, it can cause you to question the reality you thought you were living in. In fact, you may even begin to question everyone or everything around you.

Being betrayed by the one you love and trust can heavily impact your physical and mental health. As a result, it can lead to a variety of symptoms, including but not limited to:

anxiety
stress
sleeplessness
irritability
depression
grief
fear
feelings of despair or hopelessness
uncontrollable emotions

The Stages of Betrayal Trauma

Similar to grief and loss, there are stages of betrayal trauma. In addition to similar stages, there is also no specific order or timeline to the stages you might experience.

According to BloomforWomen, there are seven stages of betrayal trauma. As mentioned, you could experience each stage or only a few of them. You may even repeat stages. For example, you may feel like you reach a point of acceptance only to be triggered and find yourself back in the stage of anger or depression. Finally, there is not any specific length of time it takes to work through. For many, living with betrayal trauma may be something that doesn't go away until you seek professional help.

Here are the seven stages:

shock
denial
obsession
anger
bargaining
depression
acceptance

If you are living with betrayal trauma but feel ready to move forward, we may be able to help. Being deceived by a partner can be devastating. However, with the right support and treatment, you can heal.

At Walk By Faith Counseling, we specialize in betrayal trauma treatment. We are here to offer empathy and support as you move through your healing journey. Call us or visit our website today.

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